Day Game Advice. Natural Day Game

Five main reasons why nice guys finish last and how to change it.

This article is contributed to us by Day Game Pro. Art Malov

www.ParkBenchDating.com

Nice Guy- What do nice guy do?

The following is a breakdown of the behaviors that nice guys

not only possess, but a breakdown of what they do on an every day basis.

This is necessary to address because it is a major reason of why 'nice

guys' typically don't get the girl.



1) Behavior Matching : A 'nice guy' tries to match a woman's

motion and her body language. On a date, he tries to match what she

is doing and talk about subjects that she is interested in.

Subconsciously, he is in her frame and seeking her approval by

mirroring her.



What Art would do: Break a pattern, if she is talking about

work on a date, draw an imaginary line with your finger and say

"This is a no work talk zone. Once we are here, we don't talk about

work." This is a very powerful and simple way to stay away from

subjects that are not interesting and shouldn't be part of the

conversation to begin with. Bring up other topics. Flow with the

conversation, but don't be afraid to initiate new topics if the ones you

are talking about do not interest you.



2) Conform to the Norm: Another major aspect of 'nice guy'

behavior is trying to seem normal. What does normal mean? Normal

is just another word for ordinary. In fact, almost every guy wants to seem normal

to a girl because that's what she wants.



Or does she?



The 'nice guys finish last' phrase is a bit inaccurate. When it comes to success

with women-- nice guys just don't finish.

When a 'nice guy' is out on a date with a woman and conforms to the norm

(meaning he would not talk about a subject that he would otherwise want to talk about), he will

not bring up something original or unusual into the conversation.

Even when he has something interesting to say, he fears that he

might spook the girl. This is because a 'nice guy' wants the woman

to think of him as ordinary but she will only think of him as being

uninteresting. This conformity doesn't bring any tension or

excitement. This is how a 'nice guy' becomes just a friend.





What Art would do: Talking about his pet cat, his hatred

towards American Idol and those who are fans of the show, his

battle with mice for the ownership of his apartment, smoking Hooka,

his week long hiking trip, he would make fun of a girl for

mispronouncing the word "agronomy".



3) Self promotion : Nice guys tend to talk a lot about their own

achievements or try to show their importance/wealth even when the

conversation doesn't lead into it. Any attempt to touch on a financial

or power topic (fancy job, promotion, authority)

without conversation naturally arriving there, will lead the women to

think of you as someone who is trying to impress. This will result in

your quick entry into the friend zone.



What Art would do: Don't flaunt how much money you

make. Don't bring up your big car or boat. Unless you are trying to

score a gold digger. Money is irrelevant as long as you are not

extremely cheap. Skip this subject all together, unless she brings up

any topics about luxurious items into conversation. The conversation

has to have a natural flow and boasting does not count as such. Don't

be afraid to bring up subjects that you care about such as your

passion, your interests and hobbies. For the most part, strange

hobbies are good to talk about. Exciting hobbies are even

better. However, if you speak about a hobby that women might find

tedious (such as stamp collecting), don't mention it until a few dates

down the road unless you've got an amazingly passionate story to go

with it.



4) Flattery: 'Nice guys' tend to compliment and flatter too

much. This is a man's way of trying to be liked. Flattery is the most

common opener that guys use to approach women in the day time.

The other day, I saw a guy standing near a lamp post and as a cute

Spanish girl was passing by him, he said: "I like how you walk."

Without showing any reaction and without slowing down, she said

"Thank you." which sounded more like growl. He continued to say

all kinds of things even when she had passed and rejected him. Don't

be that guy. A simple reason why flattery doesn't work is because if

she is a good looking girl, she probably gets dozens of compliments

every day, if she is very hot, make it two dozen. Women no longer

take flattery as a compliment. Compliments have to be genuine and

be used as a reward for her behavior, rather than trying to use it as

buying her attention.



What Art would do: He wouldn't compliment a woman, unless

she had done something that was really cool, such as: knitting,

being a member of a band, doing charity work, being an avid

camper, etc. Things he really finds cool. He would not compliment

her on her appearance until after they had sex. Women get

compliments all the time and flattery is one of the easiest

conversation starters. It is also one of the least effective conversation

continuers. On a date, don't give more than one compliment and it

shouldn't be about looks. Stick to personality, because that will

make her wonder if you find her attractive. In other words, the

tension is rising and she will be more eager approve, while seeking approval.

Let's say she plays the guitar. Ask her what motivated

her to start and inspires her to continue. Feel free to tell her that her drive to

learn how to play guitar is really cool. This is the kind of

compliment that you can and should give. It is better

to limit yourself to only one compliment during the first few dates.



5) Consistency : Nice guys are very consistent and persistent. If

you think that conquering a woman's heart is done through

persistence and constant bugging, I am here to deliver a bitter pill.

Persistence doesn't get you the girl. What does get you a girl is

unpredictability. A 'nice guy' is very predictable, through a number

of ways. Women know that nice guys will always call so there is no

tension or surprise when nice guys do call. A 'nice guy' is always

there when a girl wants to see him and he is always ready to lend

a helping hand even when it's tough for him to do so. He doesn't say "NO". He is a "YES" man. Nice guys are as predictable

and exciting as white bread.



What Art would do: Not follow specific intervals in text

Messages. Sometimes he would reply in a few minutes, some times

in a few days. Call at different times of the day. His time is important and he does not have time to waste it on unconfirmed dates or appointments. He will never agree to meeting unless it is set in stone. -There are no calls on the same day to confirm- He is willing to walk away if he feels that games are being played. There is no need to play games. He will not offer to help in the hope to get on a woman's good side. He will only help when he wants to help. He will make a date when it fits his schedule. He won't go out of his way to set up a date. He often doesn't tell a woman what they will do on a date. He will just tell her where to meet.


Ok, Enough reading. Time for action! Go and put what you have read to use!

Art Malov


www.ParkBenchDating.com
www.NewYorkDatingCoach.com

www.Socialwingmen.com -meet your wingman